Joke Of The Day : Jack & The Preacher

Jack was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them. As the preacher stood next to the bed, Jack's condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on.

The pastor handed him a pen and a piece of paper, Jack used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then suddenly died. The preacher thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket. At the funeral, as he was finishing the message, he realised that Jack had handed him a piece of paper before he died. He said, "You know, Jack handed me a note just before he died. I haven't looked at it, but knowing Jack, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all."

He opened the note, and read out loud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"

Life's Like That : It Is The Time

Things will never be the same again, at this date, this time.

Whatever happened - is history.

Decission has been made and agreed upon by two parties.

This is best for both, be it short term or long term.

Life's Like That : Save On Fuel

Tyre Pressures
Low tyre pressures uses more power to move a car. It will also cause the tyres to wear out prematurely, affect the vehicles adversely, and hurt the fuel economy by increasing the rolling resistance. Refer to the car manual for the proper typre pressures.

Moderate Speed
Driving smoothly, with as little sudden acceleration or braking as possible, evens out fuel use and improves the efficiency of your car's engine. The way you drive affects how often you have to fill up.

Starting Up Car
With today's cars, it is not necessary to prime the engine first by pumping the accelerator pedal repeatedly. Do not crank the engine excessively. This only wastes fuel. When starting the engine, idle it no more than 30 seconds to warm it up. An engine will warm up faster on the road. However, avoid sudden acceleration before the engine has warmed up sufficiently.

Weight
Avoid carrying any unnecessary weight in your car. The heavier your car is, the more fuel it uses.

Traffic Anticipation
A driver can reduce fuel consumption by anticipating traffic conditions ahead and adjusting the speed accordingly, and avoiding tailgating and thus unnecessary braking and acceleration.
Accelerations and decelerations waste fuel. Braking and abrupt stops can be minimized by not following too closely and slowing down gradually when approaching a red light.

Change Up
Drive in the highest possible gear - the revs should be moderate, not too high or too low. Driving at 60kph in third gear uses up to 25% more fuel than in fifth gear.

More reading can be found at :

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/923726.stm
http://xtramsn.co.nz/lifestyles/0,,12622-4680309,00.html

Joke Of The Day : Funnies

Life's Like That : Ghost Everywhere

Oh my god!!! What's happening. I saw ghost everywhere!! No, serious! I was switching on my tv. NTV7 feel good channel showing chinese ghost movie. Changed station, Astro repeating channel, showing ghost movie!! In between commercial break, advertisement on soon to be released ghost movies!! What's happening ? I thought government banned horror movies ? No ?

Joke Of The Day : Rojak & The Dog

A couple, Karen & Rojak was being kept awake every night by the continuous barking of their next door neighbour's dog.

“That's it,” said Rojak one night as he jumped out of bed. “I'm going to sort this out!”

When Rojak returned, Karen asked, “What did you do?”

“I put the dog in our garden,” he replied. “Let's see how they like it!”

Life's Like That : Respect

Imagine this. You are renting a room to a young college student girl. Well, this girl, is kind of "open minded". Too bad, you are not. She goes out to college and comes back as and when she likes. Sometimes, past midnight, she will be going out with a bunch of friends to have 'teh tarik'. Saturday night? What else, party all night, only comes back when the sun about to rise. Sometimes, inviting a guy into the house, straight into the room at strange hours? Only God knows what happened in the room. Do you like what see ? What will be your next course of action ?

She can deny nothing happened in there, but people tends to think otherwise. There's a malay proverb, “masuk kandang kambing mengembik, masuk kandang lembu mengembu”. That is not your house. You cannot simply do things as you wish. The keyword is 'respect'. Although you are paying rental, that does not grant you the right to behave in such a manner. You might be a person that sounds wise, but your action proofs that you are not.

Pampered Yourself Here

Work work work ! Stressed ! Tension ! Pressure !
Well, it's time you deserved some pampering.
Look at what this professional has installed for you...

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